New Blog for NY Brunchers to Dish!!!


Dearest Readers,

I've started a new blog comprised solely of the euphoric insanity and absurd aventures of being single in new york. Here is the link. I would love to hear your voice! Please do read and contribute. Thanks so much loves!

-Sonia

http://BrunchDish.blogspot.com/

New York Nights.

Part Deux
*the opinions expressed here do not reflect the views of all women in new york and are solely for entertainment purposes.

Due to the request of several readers, here is the girls' version of the previous post.

Top ten questions asked by you to the person seemingly interested in you, with translation:

1. So, do you live in the city? (it's bad enough doing the walk of shame through new york, (see question #2), will i have to do the ride of shame in a subway that will last at least 45 mins (worse if you have to change stations, etc)).

Note: it's hard to figure out how to change stations, etc. when you're tired and have a headache from the night before. And when you're worrying about who you might run into in this small island of a city and an even smaller transportation system.

Note: Every new yorker has, at least once, run into someone he/she doesn't much care for in the subway.

2. Where in the city? (will i be doing the walk of shame through Wall Street with its construction-worker-heavy-whistling-zones, or Gramercy, with its family/stroller friendly trophy wives judging you more than the calamari they ordered but barely nibbled on during last afternoon's lunch at the park hotel, or through the streets of Midtown, where you drive yourself to a nervous breakdown trying to beg God in all his forms to please NOT let you run into a workaholic co-worker/manager who decided to come in on a Saturday morning).

Note: recommend sleeping over and doing breakfast together the next morning? too awkward unless you two are in a relationship or already good friends/fwbs.

3. What do you do? (will i have to pay for drinks tonight? will you pay for the first date and any other dates going forward)?

Note: a good friend of mine was on a first date when the guy fidgeted after the waiter brought out the bill. she offered to split it, like all new york women on first dates do, by putting down her card and saying "i got this." his response: are you sure??? he went on to let her pay for him on the first date.
No new yorker did the w.o.s the next morning. His "are you sure" had resonated all over the city and officially killed the game for all single, new york guys that night.
Thanks a lot friend.

Quote: He who wants to get the check never fumbles.
Note to guys: when picking up the tab for the first date, please DO NOT fumble.
Exception: if you two have been friends for a long time, it makes absolute sense to split the bill on dates. Same goes for when two people are in a relationship (it's only fair, especially if they both have similar jobs). Also if you're in Europe, where the societal norm is to go Dutch. However, if you're on a date with a European in new york, this city's rules apply.
Note: another friend's former French date found this out the hard way, but alas! it was too late.

4. Do you have roommates? (whose place will we be hanging out in. this could be a toss-up if the girl doesn't have roommates but lives in a more extreme uptown/downtown location, compared to the guy who might have roommates but lives in a more central place or the west village. everyone wants to hang out in the west village. also going through a girls' head--which guys will "accidentally" run into me in a very compromising wardrobe the next morning).

5. How long have you been living in the city? (how long have you been screwing around/how many girls have you screwed/have you screwed any of my friends/will you try to)???

6. How old are you? (are you capable of holding a conversation that lasts more than 7 minutes/do you live in a 27-roommate loft in Tribeca (with bunk-beds and all) like it's still college)???

7. When was your last relationship? (do you have any stalker ex-girlfriends that i should be worried about/will they randomly show up at every party we attend and pretend they just happened to be there while smiling at you with one eye and giving me horribly dirty looks with the other/will they add me on Facebook and start stalking me too/will she make her friends add me on FB/will i have a posse of new york women online-stalking/hating me for no reason).

8. What are you drinking? (Answer translation: Beer-- he's laid-back and fun. Wine-- he'll take me to interesting date places. Whiskey/scotch-- he might take me to interesting date places OR he's trying to be a grown-up like his father when what he really wants is a beer. Mixed drink/cocktail-- he hangs out in the MP district on Saturdays).

9. Where are your friends? (where are my future enemies that will try to convince you to break up with me so you can keep wonderful company with them by continuing the college frat scene, being lame together, and sleeping in bunk beds until you meet someone else, which will trigger this vicious cycle all over again).

And if she is European and/or very bold, confident, and self-assured.

Note: she must really be happy in this city and truly believe this to resonate this ideal inside out, and to be convincing and to herself and everyone around her.

10. So i'm not really looking for anything serious right now and i can let go faster than you can say go. i have wonderful friends and am already in love. . . with this city. i would like to live lightly and enjoy life.

Is that cool?

Fall Free-for-All!!!

Any specific questions anyone would like to ask? It can be about anything at all, so ask away my dear readers!

What triggered from my last post and was brought to my attention by several close friends and readers, is perhaps the most annoying question asked to you, by someone seemingly interested in you:

*Note: i will comment on this question, but would love to hear your opinions! Please do share.


So, why don't you have a boyfriend???

New York Nights:

Top ten questions asked to you by the person seemingly interested in you, with translation:

1. So, do you live in the city? (will i call/text you again)
2. Where in the city? (how much cab fare will it take for me to get there)
3. What do you do? (how do you pay rent to live in this city)
4. Do you have roommates? (whose place will we be hanging out in i.e. the more uptown, the less probability of your apartment being the winner, same goes for a dowtown extreme, aka Wall Street)
5. How long have you been living in the city? (how long have you been single)
6. How old are you? (how old are you)
7. When was your last relationship? (how cool are you with being single/are you going to bore me with unnecessary relationship baggage and ruin my night and/or life)
8. What would you like to drink? (Answer translation: Beer-- you're a laid-back, fun pub girl. Wine-- you're poised and particular, probably expensive. Mixed drink/cocktail-- you still hang out in the MP district on Saturdays).
9. Where are you friends? (do you have friends/will i have to deal with them/will they be annoying and judge me/will i have to deal with them everytime i meet up with you/will i start hating them and eventually hating you)

And if he is European and/or very bold, confident, and not at all afraid of rejection.

Note: he must say this extremely casually and with absolutely no sign of hesitation. Looking around the room in a non-committal fashion while he's saying this helps:

10. Ready to get out of here?

walk away. let it go. forgive. scream it out from the roof of the tallest building; this city your compassionate savior. write it away until you have no ink left. then find more and write some more. play it jazz and subtle and crimson until the blues quit and leave. chant a morning prayer until the sun comes home. jump. fall. invoke the monsoons with your tears. play ring-around-the-rosie with your friend like you're 5 years old again. dance to feel closer to trees.

this is the truth: that this universe is unfolding as it should. what happens is meant to happen. cyclically, everything comes into and walks out of our lives: seasons, emotions, events, relationships. Simlar to the journey of water in palm is the journey that anything has, which transpires through us. Stop questioning. Be.

emni kore jai jodi din, jakhna.

if the days go on in this way, let them.